Lumpy Rashes + Full Term = Scratchtastic!

Posted on March 1, 2010

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lumpyarm1

I wonder what Ben Grimm would have to say about this...

Hi, I hope you have been well.

It’s been a miserable week for Michele and I.

Michele is now considered ‘full term’ at week 37. That means Baby is ready to pop the cork and normalcy as we know it will end forever.

And what normalcy we have! Michele has developed PUPPP, or Pruritic Urticarial Papules and Plaques of Pregnancy. No, Toby did not pass it on to Michele. Rather, it’s the most difficult period of her pregnancy as she spends all day scratching. And scratching. And scratching.

The lumpy rashes are, thankfully located mostly on her arms, belly and thighs. I might consider a temporary hiatus from our relationship if she had any on her face. Nah, I’m only joking.

Our obstetrician Jean advised us that apart from slapping on copious amounts aloe vera gel (which doesn’t work), calamine lotion (works for only a couple of hours) or applying cold water for temporary relief (Michele doesn’t like cold water on her skin, so it doesn’t work) the tremendous scarring and itch will remain for as long as Baby is entombed within Michele.

The itch goes on 24/7 and keeps Michele up at night. With calamine lotion she manages an hour or two of sleep before the itch consumes her sanity.

Of course, we could induce Baby’s birth. But we won’t allow that. Michele said with great conviction she’d rather tolerate the itch and lack of sleep than have Baby born prematurely. What a trooper.

My poor wife is quite a statistic in herself. Consider this:

1) One in five women endure morning sickness into their second semester, and an unfortunate few experience nausea and vomiting for the entire duration of their pregnancy. Cue Michele.

2) PUPPP occurs in one out of every 200 pregnancies. Cue Michele.

3) Not many husbands have a vomiting, lumpy, scratching wife. Cue me.

I reckon Baby’s giving us a hard time because Baby’s got a weird sense of humour.

Ha. Ha. Ha.

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